Right/Wrong; Win/Lose: Ready to Let Go of Grievances and Move On?

grievancesYou know the feeling. 

When someone close to you has messed up. You’re stewing, running the scene over and over again in your mind. Ticking-off the grievances. Adding it to the list.

They’ve Done You Wrong

How do you move on from feeling that someone has “done you wrong”? What do you do with your grievances? How do you complete situations that are lingering in your thoughts?

As long as you hold on to a desire to be right, someone else has to be wrong. Whenever someone else has to lose in order for you to feel better, everyone loses.

Ultimately, you will feel diminished.

Grievances Cancel Freedom

Here is the point. If you need to be right, you are not free. Your energy is caught in holding on to a position.  It doesn’t allow you to move forward. When a situation must fit into certain parameters to be acceptable, nobody is free.

Sometimes you just need to forgive another’s trespass—just because.

Then, feel the conviction of your forgiveness, so that your judgment dissolves.

Forgiveness frees you for a bigger expression. When true forgiveness is permitted, your body relaxes. You discover how to be a witness in the situation, able to appreciate the way other people feel. You’re no longer attached to what they do or how they do it.

As you focus on what you need to do in your own life, you allow others the space to find their way.

Life as Teacher

Recognize every situation as part of your life experience, an arena to uncover your own blind spots and expectations. Question what you have learned from that person and their situation. As you acknowledge what you learn, your clarity sharpens and your perspective deepens. You will find yourself able to step up to a new level of self-responsibility, realizing more of your own potential. This is true potency.

You win, when you take responsibility for your actions and release the situation to be as it is. You win, when you discover that freedom awaits you on the other side of blame, expectation and judgment.

When you win without someone else having to lose, each of you has space to expand. This is the potential in every relationship. Imagine the love that can emerge!

Aren’t you ready to claim your freedom and set a new dynamic in your life?

Time to Reflect

Lake viewTake a breath. Release it. Take another. Devote some dedicated time of concentration/meditation. It doesn’t need to be hours of quiet, perhaps only 15 minutes. Then allow the question to simmer within you. Let responses bubble up into your awareness. Notice new ways of thinking, of images or ideas that arise spontaneously. Pay attention to your dreams. Let it happen. Be aware. See where it leads you next. Let yourself savor this process of receiving from yourself. Don’t judge whatever comes up, just receive it. Make notes.

You may want to share something from this process. Sharing anchors insights in your body. It leads you to deeper insight. It stimulates action. Share what moves you!

Ready to have a virtual cup of tea with me and talk about where you’ve been (and where you’re heading)? Reach out to me here to schedule a complimentary sessionThis will guide us on how to move forward, together.


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2 Responses

  1. Thank you for this beautiful focus today, Laurie. It has helped me a great deal in just the moments since reading it. I feel the release, the relaxation, and the greater flow of a situation I am experiencing now. I am shifting my attention more fully to what I am learning in this moment.

    1. It’s lovely to feel how you put this right into practice, Ellen. Thank you for taking time to share that. A shift can happen so quickly!


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